Parenting & behavior
Fear of losing your identity after becoming a mother
The fear is not always “I don't want to be a mother.” Sometimes it is “I don't want mother to become the…
Stage
Pregnancy
A selection of guides for the questions, changes and decisions that come with this stage.
52 articles
Recommended reading
Guides for you
Couple & coparenting
Fear that your relationship will change forever after having a baby
Your relationship probably will change. That can sound frightening because the mind quickly translates “change” into “damage.” But changes in time, workload,…
Potty, hygiene & autonomy
Fear that you will stop being a couple and become only parents
The fear is not only that you might argue more. It is imagining every future conversation becoming diapers, schedules, and who is…
Parenting & behavior
Fear that you won’t feel enough love for your baby after birth
Birth stories often focus on one moment: the baby is placed on you and overwhelming love appears. If you fear your reaction…
Postpartum & newborn
Fear that you won’t know what your newborn needs
Before you meet your baby, “you'll just know what they need” can sound reassuring or terrifying. What if you don't? The reality…
Motherhood, identity & wellbeing
Fear that you will not be a good mother before the baby is born
Before your baby is born, it can feel as if you are already being evaluated for a job you have not started.…
Parenting & behavior
Not feeling instant love for the baby before birth
You can be preparing an entire life for a baby and still not recognize what you feel as “love” yet. The word…
Pregnancy & preparation
Not wanting to talk to your bump during pregnancy
Someone may suggest talking, reading or singing to the baby and your honest response may simply be: that does not feel like…
Family, siblings & boundaries
Feeling different from other pregnant women who seem more excited
In groups, social media and family conversations, some pregnant women seem intensely excited about every milestone. Comparison can turn a difference in…
Play, learning & autonomy
Feeling guilty for complaining about pregnancy when you wanted to be a mother
You can have wanted motherhood for years and still hear an inner correction the moment you say, “I am so tired of…
Pregnancy & preparation
Not enjoying pregnancy even though it was deeply wanted
Some people remember pregnancy with nostalgia. Others count the weeks until it is over. Neither experience, by itself, measures how much the…
Pregnancy & preparation
Wanting pregnancy to be over and feeling guilty for not enjoying it
Counting weeks can create an emotional contradiction: you want the baby deeply and still wish you could skip ahead to the part…